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Are we all done puking? Great!
There’s literally so much cringe going on in this video that I’m getting premature crows feet. I don’t even know where to start. I mean this sh*t is an abortion on toast straight from the beginning to end.
So, in-between dry heaves, I’ll do my best to break all this down.
1 – What the f*ck is going on?
I mean, it’s obvious what’s going on, but… ummm… what the f*ck. I find this particular social media challenge so disabled, I don’t even know the name of it. It’s not even a challenge haha. Like, Hello! The ‘70s happened like 50 years ago, nobody cares about your nude body anymore. Like, guaranteed, your boyfriend was probably already looking at some naked bimbo on Brazzers 5 mins before you walked in with your little towel on. Quit acting like it’s 1959, and realize that we’ve all been desensitized to those mosquito bites under your shirt. If you really wanna challenge yourself these days, find out how to be sexy with your clit -shockingly- not exposed.
2 – We lose brain cells whenever we hear you talk like a baby.
Seriously, keep it to yourself and your dog. Embarrassment is all I’d feel if someone that I liked talked to me in that way. I’d be sitting there thinking that you must have some crazy social disorder for you to willingly talk like an idiot. Listen to this chick in the video, and tell me that it doesn’t make your dick shrivel up inside your pelvis. Or like your vagina dry out, if you’ve got one of those. I feel like you’d have to be some kind of pervert to enjoy that, and these guys have the quinntessential look for one of those DDLG couples.
3- Where the hell is the maid in this place?
Hi, you’re living in squalor. And you’re not just living in it, you’re videoing it! Some people just have no social awareness. Like what a way to advertise that you’re most likely a carrier for Hepatitis A. This whole room gives me the freaking creeps. Did you see the window?
I have this huge pet peeve about non-curtains being used as curtains, super trashy. But in this case, trash-baggy. I feel like we’ve all seen a cheap cartoon blanket in someone’s window, and hurled our guts out. In their case, who the hell duct tapes trash bags over the glass? If you want the sun blocked out, buy a sun-blocking curtain! Totally not hard, I’ve already found 10 on Amazon. “But what if they’re broke?” I can already hear people whining. Being broke does not lead anyone to having such disgusting environs. I went to school with a bunch of very very poor kids, and whenever I went over to their house I wasn’t worried about Scabies. I think it just comes down to self-respect, like do you love yourself enough to make sure you don’t live at what could be called the city dump.
I pray these people read this. Like, I just need them to know how completely gross this whole experience was, and how uncool it is that they uploaded it to the internet. Not because I’m a complete dickhead, but because I want them to learn, I want their eyes to be opened to better living practices, but, most of all, I just want them to take down the f*cking trash bags.
