Okay, so here’s something I find pretty rad that’s been going on lately. Apparently, all these younger people are having these things called “Vasectomy parties”. At first, I was wondering who the fu*k celebrates a vasectomy? Like theres knives gouging, and mutilating, your soft, precious dick skin, and your balls swell up like giant bruised coconuts, what the hell is there to celebrate about that? Sounds like I’d be pissing blood for weeks, or something.
Bloody urine aside, the celebration is for infertility, or the fact that you can’t have children. Vasectomies tie your tubes up, and prevents the little buggers from swimming upstream into your lady-friend, and getting her all pregnant, and sh*t. Which leads to her popping out a mound of living, breathing, sh*tting flesh. Which can definitely be like the end of the world to some people.
This came about from how expensive having a family costs these days. More, and more people are choosing to save their fat wads of cold, hard cash, instead of dropping it all on some whiney brat who can’t go 5 minutes without pissing everywhere.
The party mimics a baby shower, with games, and all that jazz. It’s actually pretty funny, the games they play all have to do with what sh*t you’re going to buy with all that extra greenbacks you’ll have stored up in your bank account. Guests can even help you choose a name for the real baby in your life: your ride. Be it boat, or car, or whatever the fuck else. And, unlike baby showers, you, and everyone, can booze it up the whole time, because theres no fucking kids involved. So, if you thought that party sounded lame, you guys definitely don’t have to grit and bare through it sober.
I’d totally have a vasectomy party. I mean, I’m gay, and last i checked you can’t get pregnant through the ass, so i wont have to deal with the actual vasectomy part. The idea of a vasectomy party, in my opinion, is probably to combat the social stigma of not reproducing. Willfully childless parents are thought to be selfish, vain people, who have no real purpose to life, just because they don’t want the hassle of raising children, which is exactly what some people are saying about this. Which is pretty fucked up, why shame people for that? What if they know they’d be terrible parents, or just don’t feel the desire for offspring? I think it’d be sh*tty to put a child into either of those situations. I think people kind of just need to mind their own business, you know? If you want a baby shower, cool. If someone else wants a vasectomy party, that’s cool, too. The world is already overpopulated as fuck, so in reality, these people are helping your future generations, by not adding to the strain on resources. That’s a really awesome reason to celebrate not having kids, as well as all the extra cash you can use to have the kind of life you’ve always dreamed about, and not being covered in sour baby feces 24/7.
