• Blog - Life

    The Treatment

    As we all know, I’m a recently licensed medical esthetician, and I’ve scored my first job at a medical spa, over in Bakersfield! I’ve been getting to do tons of cool sh*t, from things like laser light therapy, to using electrical currents to literally work out people’s face muscles. But,…

  • Blog

    Blow It Up Your Cat’s A$$

    Recently, I’ve been wanting a cat super bad. The last cat i had was, like, dragged off my porch one night by some vicious animal, or something. So, obviously, I’ve been needing to find another furry friend to smother with all the burning love pent up inside my over-affectionate body.…

  • News

    Facebook VR: Is it Stupid, or What?

    So, you probably didn’t know, unless you’re some tech geek, that Facebook has purchased the king of all that is virtual reality technology: Oculus. Sounds weird that they’d do that, but Facebook is always on the prowl for whatever they can find to keep them popular and on the tippy-top…

  • Blog

    Making Beds is for Chumpz

    Why do people make their beds? It’s rarely easy, it’s practically pointless, and I f*cking hate it. It could go crawl in a hole, and die, and I wouldn’t even bat an eye. But, yet, people still do it, and they love forcing their sick, perverted ways on the general…

  • Blog

    Recently, everyone and their brother has been doing this whole thing on Facebook where you tell all of your friends which three fictional characters represent your personality. Which is actually kind of cool, because it’s giving people a chance to be more introspective, and actually take a look at themselves…

  • Blog

    Brain Thing Does Us Some Coolness

    “The system we have developed uses signals recorded from the motor cortex of the brain to trigger coordinated electrical stimulation of nerves in the spine that are responsible for locomotion,” – David Borton, Assistant Professor at Brown University Okay, so this probably sounds like a bunch of confusing science-y bullshit,…

  • Blog

    Some Plato-Wannabe Motherf*cker

    Some nights, when I get real high, and get to feeling really good, I start thinking of some crazy sh*t. For real, I turn into some Plato-wannabe motherf*cker, spouting out things that probably wouldn’t make sense to anyone, but my lame self. The subjects of which, range from a slew…

  • Blog

    Selfish Annie and the Half-Starved Prince

    Why can’t Anastasia just cook for me? I mean, there’s, like, tons of reasons I could give you, for having her cook me some food. However, she likes to act cruel towards Little Chasey, and denies me my meals on a regular basis. She says stuff like “Learn to cook…

  • Blog

    Alcohol

    Alcohol is so disgusting. Like, the taste on my tongue alone is enough to make me puke everywhere. I literally get scared before i take shots, because I know I’m about to be grossed the fuck out. I guess I’m just a big pussy when it comes to drinking, because…

  • Blog

    Green Crack

    Out of all of the hundreds upon thousands of strains of marijuana, i gotta say that I’m really loving “Green Crack”. And, I’ve smoked copious amounts of weed in my day, so I feel like i have, at least, a basic grasp on what’s good out there in the world,…