So, just like the world-renowned character Chad Danforth from High School Musical, I’m definitely not a dancer. They can all move their bodies, shake their asses, match the beat, and always look so phenomenal while doing it; takes a lot of confidence, which I burn…
I’ve always had a thing for cats. I think they’re cute as hell, hilarious little beasts, and I love their big ol’ personalities, which make you love them even more. Plus, they’re usually super independent, which is great for me, because I’m totally one of those people who love the…
It amazes me how people still go out suntanning. Even worse, it REALLY amazes me how people still like willingly step foot into tanning beds. I don’t know if it’s the UV rays that are killing their brain cells, but it’s a super well-documented scientific…
One of the most stupidest things in the world is being given flowers as a gift. Like, I couldn’t think of something more annoying, or more cliche. I’m not a huge dickhead, so I still register it as a nice gesture, and thank the person.…
I really dislike shots. Don’t know about you, but there’s always been something about being taken away to get stabbed, and have your veins flooded with some unknown-to-you concoction of chemicals, that’s induced a certain fear inside me. So, naturally, I’ve accumulated a decent…
Okay, so these are seriously an addiction. I eat ‘em before I go to work, I eat ‘em before I go home, I eat ‘em in my f*cking dreams. They’re so good, if I had to inject them into my bloodstream, I wouldn’t even hesitate. Egg Bite me the hell…
It must be really gnarly to kill your own folks. Like, you’ve known your parents since Day One. There’s thousands of memories you have with them locked away in your brain. Tons of bonds you’ve formed with them over the years. So, for someone to take all of that, and…
One day, back when I was in high school, I was watching South Park on tv, and I think Cartman was talking about something called like ‘Trypophobia’. So, I looked that sh*t up on my phone, and I literally died instantaneously. One of the scariest things…
Instagram is weird, man. People seriously just post whatever they damn well please. Like, without grasping the full reality of what exactly they’re even posting. It’s like social media acts as a mask, so these people can sh*t out whatever they want to the rest of the world, without even…
Okay, so Nationwide Insurance needs to fire their commercial-idea-maker person, because they seriously suck major a$$. Their latest duo of advertisements make my head hurt with frustration over the complete stupidity of it all. What’s so wrong with it? Well, allow me to break it all down for you. Failure…